The Freedom of Positive Thinking (and Metal Structures)

I hope you can forgive me for not yet finishing my homework, but I’d had somewhat of a lightbulb moment.

For two years I have been in my current job and for one and a half years I have quite literally hated it. Sometimes I think of the person I was 2 years ago and the shadow of that person I see today. Part of it is the isolation, another part is down to the disgraceful treatment I have received from my line manager but I have to say the third part is most definitely down to me. I would often dwell on the time that I am wasting in the office and would fail to see the positives.

On Friday I entered my work place information on my Facebook profile (yes, I’m back on Facebook) because although it may not be a job I enjoy, it may not be a job that others respect but it is a job that no one can do as well as I can. After a work event earlier this week, a volunteer commented on how the office would not function without me. That was the first time I had received any form of recognition from a colleague.

One’s mind is a powerful instrument. I had got myself into a mindset that the job was terrible. Despite how my line manager acted towards me, I should not let him make me feel like a  failure. I know so many people who detest their jobs and I was (notice past tense, please) one of them. My advice to you (and myself) is to remember what you are good at. I am spending more and more time writing and working on hobbies. Perhaps I should not say this but during really slow days at work I sometimes work on my writing, particularly as I am basing my villain on my work colleagues! Success really is the best form of revenge. If anyone tells you that you are bad at your job, that you are not good enough – prove them wrong. Do your utmost to prove them wrong.

This weekend we brought a car. A second-hand car, mind but it’s first-hand in our eyes. I never thought I would think a metal structure on four wheels could be so beautiful but it is. It really is! If I wasn’t working, we wouldn’t be able to afford the car or the lovely house we are now living in. I wouldn’t now have a husband who has synced our car to our phones and who is now reading the manual from front to back.

I’m proud of where I work and you should be to. It may not be ideal and if that is the case it is important to work on making it better. Find what you are good at and excel at that. Love writing? Write a book. Love music? Sing a song. Love acting? Join an acting group. What has helped me is that I have my writing on the side and it is what keeps me going. I want to be a writer and I now feel that I am doing something about it.

For those of you who are looking for work, do not lose heart. I was without work for 6 months. What I regret most during that time is not spending enough time on what I enjoy. I spent the entire time job hunting. I wish now that I spent at least one day a week on writing and writing alone. Who knows where I would  be now? Take this time to learn where you want to be in life and counter balance the disappointment and uncertainty you feel with positivity and comfort. Be a little selfish while you still can.


Despite my earlier reluctance to share my past week’s writing experience, I can now proudly declare that I have made a children’s book! It may have been out of paper, uneven and full of sellotape but it looks like a book. Next stop, writing the text and unleashing my terrible drawing skills…  Still no life history of my villain but I’m hoping my little achievement this weekend will propel me further and further forward…


4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Lucy
    Dec 11, 2011 @ 11:44:15

    Everything you’ve said in this post is so true. I felt the same in my old job, and the way I coped with the final year there was to do just as you’ve described. I kept my focus on the things I love and the things I am good at. Of course, as you know, I still had really bad days, and I sometimes spent half an hour crying before I even left the house. But deep down I knew I was better than they made me feel, and my strongest days were when my attitude was positive and I held my head up high.

    I really want to read your children’s book! I bet it’s awesome 😀

    PS. I wrote during quiet times at my old job – you’re not alone in that. There’s only so long creativity can be kept at bay!


    • alphabetgames
      Dec 14, 2011 @ 13:04:58

      Thank you for your comment, Lucy. I am sorry that you had a bad time in your previous job and I am glad that you are now away from that situation. Such situations must be the plight of the creative and successful! It’s nice to know I’m in good company!

      I can’t wait to read your book either! Hope NaNoWriMo served you well!


  2. grandmac
    Dec 11, 2011 @ 18:12:03

    So pleased you have finally got through to seeing the positives even if you still hate the work environment or the people in it. Just keep writing whenever you can and you’ll get there I’m sure.


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