The End To My Distracted Parenting


distractionparentingMy mobile phone broke  recently, I use the word broke to imply it was hit by a wooden toy hammer by my near two-year old. At first I felt very insecure, similar to hanging off a cliff edge without a safety net. I used my phone for everything: from shopping and shopping lists; to listening to music; to medication records for my daughter. I would use my phone to catch up on social media while getting my daughter to sleep both for her nap and at night. Only occasionally would I use it to make phone calls. As a replacement, I insisted on using an old phone we keep in reserve for international visitors, the only one without easy access to social media and the Internet.  It has now been about 2 weeks and I must say I have not looked back..

For a while now I have resented bedtime, resented the disruption to my casual social media catch up of the day. However, without the distraction of technology I have enjoyed night-time cuddles so much more. I realise now that rather than being a comfort social media has been more a distraction. Me time no longer involves Facebook or Twitter or Instagram, it involves cuddling my daughter in the rocking chair and feeling her little fingers wrap around the loose strands of my hair.  I now resent the social media I once craved for.  I do not want my daughter’s memories of me as being on my phone, my iPad or my laptop. I want her to always look at me and see me looking back at her.  I want her as an extension of my hand, and not a cold, metal piece of technology.

distractionmum

I was told recently that it is unhealthy that I spend so much time with my daughter. One day she will start nursery then will attend school full-time and I will be left with an empty nest. Yes, no doubt I may very well stay in the car park until the bell rings and will highly likely suffer more from separation anxiety than my daughter will. But, is that not the price of motherhood? So many people talk of motherhood as a sacrifice: we as mothers give up so much to raise our children. We give up regular showers, clean clothes, nights out, even solitary trips to the bathroom. I know it will likely be harder for me than for  her when the time does come for her to enter the world without me, but that to me is the sacrifice of motherhood. Already, I can’t believe that next month she will be two years old. It feels like yesterday when I bought her home from the hospital. I remember thinking how a year seemed such a long time when she was a baby, but now one year seems so insignificant. And it is only one more year until she enters the world without me by her side. I do not want to spend this last year distracted by status messages and tweets.

The social media networks are a wonderful thing and we all know and enjoy their benefits, myself included. Having said this, I would prefer my daughter to  fall asleep watching my eyes laying upon hers, rather than she fall asleep watching the light from my phone flickering across my distracted eyes.

motherslove

Opening image: www.babypost.com
Second image: themominitiative.com
Third image: bestquotesfb.blogspot.co.uk
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3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. grandmac
    Nov 24, 2014 @ 22:16:27

    Luckily we didn’t have that particular problem when my children were young!! I’m sure she won’t begrudge you the occasional glance at Facebook! I

    Reply

  2. Rubyslippers
    Nov 25, 2014 @ 16:43:36

    Usually when my children went to sleep, all they saw was their exhausted mother asleep before them most of the time. However having said that, I have never been interested in facebook, twitter etc etc and am not a member of social media sites. They bore me senseless and quite honestly!!

    I think the new generation are so accustomed to technology that its normal for them, so dont worry about it, she wont hold it against you later in life if you look at your phone now and then.

    She is a lucky girl to have such a devoted and caring mother!!!

    Reply

  3. Sasha
    Dec 15, 2014 @ 02:31:59

    I love this!!

    Reply

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